I'm new on this forum, I find it absolutely great... I mean, in my whole 38 years life I never spoke about nys to anyone other than my parents and wife. From time to time I've been surfing the net searching for something similar, found it just now!
I'm happy to be given the opportunity to share with somebody else my feelings about this strange kind of "manufacturing defect" I was born with... I've always been feeling sad about talking or just only thinking about it. This is also due to all uncertainty that according to my experience has always been surrounding this strange desease, I mean I never received precise answers to all precise questions I asked doctors about why could it happen, how many people is affected, if there is any way at least to keep it a little bit under control, since everybody is always telling that it is impossible to have it definitely and completely cured.
Not to mention all the other unpleasant things and feelings that are accompanying me since I realized I was not exactly like all the others... why me among million people? Why all the others can enjoy their perfect stereo-sight at 360 degrees without such stupid limitation and difficulties I got? What the evil is this thing, is it possible that humans went to the Moon but are not capable to cure this... why I'm reluctant to talk to others about this... people are nasty with me because most of the times I'm not able to look in their eyes when talking to them, sometimes I'm not able to recognize them along the street so they start searchingthe reason why I didn't want to say them hello... but for reasons unknown my mind does not want to reveal the secret, is not willing to explain the reason...
... and many other bad situations I'm sure you're much familiar with!
Anyway, first feeling to be shared with you is something positive, something going beyond the pessimistic vision I've had till now. Why? Simply because I now realized that, in my desperate misfortune, I'm among the luckyest.
I walk. I run. I scored almost half a million kms driving cars, riding motorbikes and bicycles. I make some sport (when not, it is just because... I'm tired and I prefer to relax!). I got graduated. I've got a completely satisfactory job which takes me to lots of places around the world. I love my wife and my two children. Who did not inherited a lonely bit of "my dear nys", despite what few doctors were scaring me about before we planned to have kids...
All in all, I can live my life without big problems. Just I have to respect my limits and never forget them. I'm aware about them, I have to share my life with them. Ok, I cannot race my motorbike like other (regardless of common sense and safety, anyway) do around me, but I just ride at normal speed, sometimes just a little bit faster, sometimes (when I'm tired, or feel my eyes flickering more than average), a little bit slower. I did not take part to army when I was young. I will never be an airliner pilot. I will never be an actor or a TV presenter 'cause I'm not able to steadily head and keep my eyes in the required direction for the needed time. I don't feel happy when people takes photos of me because of the same reason. I will never win any prize for being able to see things other don't see. That's all. I'm not the only to have nys. Anyway, I'm not the one to have the worst nys...
What makes me feel sad now is that lot of people has a much stronger nys than I have, many of them can't do some of the things I consider normal to do... I've read of people struggling just for standing up, for having a simple walk around, just for distinguishing objects and colors, just to...
This is enough for me to understand now.
This is enough for me to stop complaining about my condition.
This is enough for me to light that little spark in my brain and let me start thinking of other people who is less, much less or dramatically less lucky than me.
To all these people, inside or outside this forum, I would like to tell that I'm with them, beside them, I sincerely share with them their feelings, and I wish that some day, they (we) can find the way out from this problem.
But, until then, they (we) should be aware that there's always someone who is suffering much harder than we are, having much more serious illness or desease.
From time to time I'll surely be visiting the forum, if there's anybody willing to share feelings and opinions... I'd be happy to!
Cheers to all of you